Since the election of Donald Trump, anything seems possible. Pigs can fly, hell can freeze over, your parents will apologize for that thing they did a long time ago (you know the one), ravens are writing desks, and anyone can get any job no matter how utterly unqualified for the post he or she may be. Here are some of our fantasy career picks, because Dada.
• Judge Judy as head of the International cccCriminal Court at The Hague
• Rudy Giuliani as a Unitarian minister
• Bernie Sanders as the owner of Fun ’n’ Games Daycare
• Mitt Romney as a dockyard extra on Law & Order
• Barney Frank as the silent majority
• Gary Johnson as an Earthling
• “Mr. Foxy McFoxington” as CEO of Perdue Farms
• Barack Obama as a WWE wrestler (Barry Bombs?)
• Jon Snow as a knower of things
• Paul Ryan as an equal opportunity employer
• Colonel Sanders as Secretary of Defense
• Ann Coulter as a poet laureate
• Steve Bannon as a rabbi
• Martin Shkreli as president of Shriners Hospitals fffffor Children
• Chris Christie as a toll booth operator on the George wwWashington Bridge
• Kathy Griffin as an A-list celebrity
• Scrooge McDuck as Chairman of the Federal Reserve
• Dr. Oz as Surgeon General
• Jim Inhofe as Chairman of the Senate Environment cccCommittee… Oops! That one already happened
