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Space Genius Ted Cruz Is Super Worried About Space Pirates Stealing our Space Booty

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President Trump’s proposed Space Force has found new support from a fleshy sack of dogfood and charmlessness that wears a suit and calls itself “Ted Cruz.” This talking sack is the Senator from Texas, and has decided that we need to fund the proposed Space Force to protect us from space pirates. Yep. Pirates, in space.

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